STERiEAUX(un)DEAD

Josephus Vice

To Life.
A Love Supreme – John Coltrane

~

Cedric the Wise Himalayan House-cat resonated pure energy.
His large, green eyes closed as he continued…

“…and there were creatures who saw the sound of life with their eyes…
…and there were creatures who heard the light of life with their ears…
…and there were creatures who smelled the flavor of life with their noses…
…and there were creatures who tasted the scent of life with their tongues…
…and there were creatures who felt the complexities of life with their skins…
…and there were creatures who understood the sensations of life with their minds…”

The assembly looked up, attentively.
The air was thin.

~

So, George Orwell and Albous Huxley had been on the right track all along. So had most of those “crazy” hippies, “paranoid” conspiracy theorists and “quacky” doomsday prophets, who always liked to “carry on like the sky was about to fall.”
It did.
But not before the Illuminati unveiled their eternal secrets, not before the 3rd World War was waged, not before what some would call the “apocalypse” came and shredded our little green planet to bits.
Zombies eventually ate everybody, even those with panic rooms.
Comets rained down and the stars aligned and the polar axes shifted…seven times…imagine that, John Lennon!
Ice age? Check. California in the ocean? Check. Pleiades visitations? Check. Haziness on the details of events so long ago transpired? Check.

Damn…

~

Ancient man travelled through time.
The first was on a quest to find a woman.
His name was Grok. Her’s was Urogk.
How did he travel through time?
WELL…

~

“I’m off on the adven-ture…I’m on my way to hea-ven.” – Kid Cudi
RokBott10o and RaveBott1xX used to tear it up on intergalactic levels. Light-year-long benders bounced on and on throughout the cosmos.

~

See, I’ve been undead for going on five hundred years now…very undead. Somehow, I’ve managed to stumble my way through this entire “final” act of modern mankind…a strange testament to the resiliency of life, I have to admit.
I haven’t seen another life form except for the eternal roach in over two hundred years…another example of life marching along, transmuting itself through the ether of endless birth and the release of infite death….all manifestations of life are for a time…life is eternal, so it seems.

~

Ancient man tripped on psychedelic mushrooms.
The earliest generations of man tripped on psychedelic mushrooms that made the time/space continuum warp, stretch, condense, twist. In this way, “time” as an onward marching force in and of itself didn’t exist.
Sadly, ancient man ate this particular species of mushroom into extinction. It was the first species of anything to be forced into extinction in the history of, well, history…his-story…

~

“Take anything you want from me…” – Jimi Hendrix

Hear that?
That’s RokBott10o keeping it 100%. He was programmed to spin the most perfect song for each and every moment that he could possibly find himself in. His other functions include rolling perfect joints every time and blowing shit up, so as not to cause tons of damage, but so as to look really badass.

“Rok” and RaveBott1xX, his “female” companion-bott, were both initially to be ingenious manifestations of a childhood dream of one Dr. Quincy Sterieaux; genius inventor, father of several sciences, and…most unfortunately, as it turns out…co-founder of BottCo., yes…THE BottCo….the infamous intergalactic machinery juggernaut. We’ll return to Dr. Sterieaux and Bottco’s fabled stories later, but back to Rok and Rave…only 27 sets of the righteously awesome pair saw the soddering gun, so to speak.

One set for every one of Bottco’s CEO’s adolescent children.

~

So, this is where my story now begins, well past the end of everything that meant so very much to human beings, now as a long-starved and, most likely, last-standing zombie, leaning up against the one free-standing wall of what was once, long, long ago, a small jazz club in Portland, Oregon.
It’s the only free-standing wall left in the pacific northwest, actually…a relic, just like me.

My name is Zombeatnik.
This is Sterieaux Undead.

~

Chapter Two

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